A positive pregnancy test can raise a serious subject long before either of you expected it.
You are probably still learning about how your partner responds to stressful situations, and now you have to talk about a potentially life-altering development.
First, remember that you don’t have to rush and tell him before you are ready. Taking the time to prepare and get the information you need can make a big difference when you do have the conversation.
Keep reading for practical tips, as well as ways Voice of Hope Pregnancy and Family Center offers no-cost, confidential services to support you and your partner as you weigh your options.
Gather the Facts Before You Talk
Knowing the details about your pregnancy is an important first step.
Voice of Hope offers no-cost, confidential pregnancy testing so you can verify your result in a supportive environment.
If the result is positive, a limited ultrasound gathers critical information about your pregnancy and health, including the gestational age, location, and viability of your pregnancy.
Knowing these details will help you understand your options and guide your conversation with your partner.
Choose the Time and Place to Talk
Because the relationship is new, you may not yet know how he responds under stress.
Pick a time when neither of you is hurried and a place where you feel secure.
It’s also ok to share the news before you’ve reached a decision. Telling him you are pregnant and still gathering information is a good place to begin.
Remember that your safety is the top priority. If you worry he may respond with a physical or violent outburst, consider meeting in a public place or having a trusted friend nearby. Remember, you can also refrain from sharing the news if you have concerns for your well-being.
You can also reach out to the National Domestic Violence Hotline (1-800-799-7233) for 24/7 support, or call 911 in an emergency.
Listen to His Response Without Handing Over the Decision
Shock, quiet, and questions are common first reactions.
A partner who asks how you are feeling and what you need is offering support.
A partner who sets deadlines, threatens to leave, or ties money to a particular outcome is applying pressure.
Remember, you are the one who’s pregnant, so the decision rests with you and deserves full information.
If your partner is pressuring you to choose an abortion, both of you need to know that there are risks involved.
Medical abortion can cause heavy or prolonged bleeding, infection, an incomplete abortion that requires follow-up care, and an ongoing pregnancy if the drugs do not work.
Surgical abortion carries risks of cervical damage, uterine perforation, infection, and scar tissue that may affect future fertility.
A Place for Him to Ask Questions
If your partner is supportive but feels confused or overwhelmed, we offer confidential support for men who want information and a place to discuss what they are experiencing.
He can speak with one of our male advocates who understands the pressure he may be feeling and will take the time to listen to his concerns and answer all his questions.
We are Here for You
Regardless of how your partner responds, we are here for you.
The services and support we provide are designed to empower you to make the best decision for your health and future. Our team provides no-cost options information, with thorough details on abortion, adoption, and parenting in a pressure-free, confidential space.
Contact us today to schedule your appointment.
Voice of Hope Pregnancy and Family Center does not provide or refer for abortions.
All abortion information sourced in this blog is based on accurate information at the time of writing.